"What Is Darts Going To Do For Me?"
This link will take you to a single page pamphlet directed toward pub owners. It is designed to tout the advantages for them of installing a dartboard. The inspiration for this publication came as a realization. We were reinforcing a stereotype by devoting our attention, almost exclusively, on English/Irish bars. The rest of the ethnic community was being ignored unless they approached us. Other leagues may feel free to adopt or adapt this piece with our blessing. For distribution we print it on a sturdy 67lb stock.THE BIG MATCH: Bush versus Kerry!!!
Dartoid Political campaigns are decidedly made into emotional orgies which endeavor to distract attention from the real issues involved, and actually paralyze what slight powers of celebration man can normally muster." -- James Harvey Robinson Game on! --Russell Bray Thirty years ago I wrote a column for my college newspaper. My beat was politics. Nixon. McGovern. Watergate. Vietnam. What amazing times. What memories... And damn, did I have a lot to say. Not about politics, mind you. Blimey NO! mostly I wrote about getting wasted. And hot chicks. The more some things change, the more others stay the same. Just as politics was center stage then so it is again today. The names of the candidates have changed. The hot spots in the world have changed. But the issues are strangely similar. It's weird. The 1972 campaign was about choices. For example, as Pink Floyd spun the turntable late one night, one of the choices my roommates and I explored was: if you found yourself stranded for life on a deserted island what would you rather have -- a dozen beautiful girls or an endless supply of killer weed? Yes, it was a damn difficult question. But what would Nixon and McGovern have done? It's by exploring such possibilities that voters come to really know the candidates. Today we have Bush and Kerry. Times are again turbulent. The country is divided. Each and every one Of us has a very important decision to make. We need to examine the candidates carefully. We need to arm ourselves so we can vote smart. I voted for Nixon. I admit it. I voted dumb. But I wouldn't have if I thought he'd have picked the girls. That would have meant I couldn't have 'em. Voters everywhere (except in England where you can't vote -- until Bush bombs the hell out of you and makes you the 51st state) face a very serious choice. To help YOU, the darter-voter, make the right choice, my friend, Ed Edwards (Hall of Fame member, current director of Tournament Darts International in Washington, D.C. and flaming liberal) and I have agreed to face-off in a sort of point-counter-point debate to explore the question that you simply must consider before deciding which lever to pull this November. Of course, that burning question is: what if the next World Darts Championship does not come down to the usual suspects but rather, a face-off between Bush and Kerry -- who would win? Exploring the strategy of the candidates, contemplating their strengths and weaknesses at the line, what mental games they and their handlers might employ and so much more will (Ed and I hope) help you to make the right choice this November. So let's get rollin'. Ed's going to argue for Kerry and start first (even though he lost the cork). I won it for Bush but, like Phil Taylor, gave the first handful back to Ed -- because I know I'm going to kick his ass anyway. Bush is The "American" Power. He'll score fast and heavy. It'll be Shock and Awe, baby. IMPORANT DISCLAIMER: Both Ed and I are well aware of the long-standing rule that three subjects should never be discussed in a real man's darts bar: 1) religion, 2) politics, and 3) the dream you had last night about your buddy's wife. We apologize in advance for breaking all of these rules below. ED: Hi folks. I'd like to give you some personal background like Paul but, as someone once said, "If you can remember the `60s, you weren't there." (Or was it the `70s? I dunno.) I do sort of remember flipping the bird to a Nixon motorcade on Executive Avenue one afternoon from my Kawasaki. The rest of that era is a bit of "purple haze" mixed with tear gas, compliments of Paul's Nazi friends. How these guys can be proud of supporting felons, I don't understand. Did you know that GW Bush is the first president to enter office with a criminal record? Drunken driving, Maine, 1976. Well, on with the show! This is definitely going to be a tough match, Bush being ranked #1 and all. Of course he did become the top seed because his brother was the scorekeeper and his daddy appointed the caller for the last Championships. But that was 4 years ago, and since then the crowd has had an "up close and personal" chance to see him in action. Although he still has a league match to get past, Kerry looks well on his way. He's had to work his way up to the stage by besting nine opponents, but even the chick from Windy City and the brother from the old Knickerbocker league had better ppd averages than the junior Bush. John "Bring It On" Kerry is in great form. Still and all, it will be tough, Bush is pretty impressive in his flight suit with all the corporate logos on it. Those are his owners, oops, I mean sponsors. The Kerry followers have confided in me that they really only have two concerns going into the championships: (1) the spinning dartboard that the Bush managers have insisted on (whenever GWB starts missing his target, his boys hit the spin button. Sometimes it's after he's thrown. Sometimes it's while he's throwing. Tough to keep track.) and, of course, (2) the new electronic scoring machines (built and serviced by one of Bush's sponsors). Like the rest of you I'll be watching the match on cable because Bush's security people have already advised me that I will not be allowed into the "big tent." Evidently, to get close to Bush is either by free invitation or very, verry, verrry expensive. That's all for now. DARTOID: At the end of the day winning darts (just like this election) is about composure and having the strength under pressure to make the tough decisions and act on them. This is why under the limelight and in front of the crowd at Circus Tavern, Bush will expose Kerry as the 194-proof, phony, liberal elitist he is. If Kerry and his followers' concerns are limited to "spinning dartboards" and "electronic scoring machines" my recommendation is that they stop smokin' the ganja, get over Al Gore's defeat and face reality. Neither the World Championship nor the White House is the place for the weak, indecisive or just plain wishy-washy. Of course, neither is it the place for a liar either. Whether one agrees with Bush on the issues or questions his integrity, it is flat-out impossible to doubt his commitment to what he believes. Just two days after the September 11 terrorist attacks Bush laid it on the line: "When I take action, I'm not going to fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt. It's going to be decisive." This is the kind of confident, sure-of-himself, combatant that will pick Kerry apart during the long format at Purfleet. This is a match that strongly favors someone who not only can hit the triple twenty, but who can be counted on to pound it when the chips are down. Athletic achievement is not something one can fake. The stopwatch doesn't lie. You can either bench press a few hundred pounds or drop the bar on your throat. The dart's either in the number or it ain't. There's no room for straddlers. You are watcha are. Kerry's gonna "take on the special interests" but he's raked in over $600,000 from the health care, automotive and airline industries. He's for the war; he's against the war. He going to return America back to the "common man" -- a segment of our society he claims to understand. Probably he does. He hobnobbed among us while attending Swiss boarding schools. He caroused with our women while sailing on John F. Kennedy's yacht. He lives in an elegant Georgetown house with his half-billion-dollar-ketchup-tycoon-heiress wife and dashes off in her private jet to any number of family vacation homes. Yep, this guy understands me. I think I'll give him a call and see if he'd like to meet me up at the Fox and Hound for a couple jars and watch NASCAR. John Kerry is as phony as they come. Mark my words, Eddie, the pundits are smokin' the wacky-weed too. Gore and Kevin Painter may have taken Bush and Taylor into sudden death last go-around but this time it'll be a different story. Once Kerry's under the microscope at Circus Tavern and the pressure's on -- as the election draws closer -- composure will make the difference. Bush will hit hard, close big and drop the bar on Kerry's throat. I figure straight sets. ED: Well Paul, I must admit, the idea of Bush in the winner's circle does fill me with "shock and awe." I remain un-intimidated however, because I have no doubt that he is incapable of hitting the double out. I base that on his record. I'm pretty sure he doesn't even know what the double out is. As a matter of fact, he seems to be aware of only 2 numbers: a "lot" (what he wants to transfer to the uber-rich and mega-corps) and a "little" (what he actually wants to spend on first-line defenders like police, fire and medical personnel so they can realistically do what he has proposed that they do.) Uh oh, my bad... there is another number: "none." That is what he would like to allot for the less fortunate. After all, every time he has gotten into a bind (which has been quite frequent) someone has come along to bail him out. Hence the reliance on "faith-based" assistance. It's always worked for him, so it should work for everyone else. On close inspection, a trust in divine intervention appears to be what prompts him to throw those darts in any willy-nilly direction with absolute certainty they will hit the board. Rape the land, pillage the waters, sack the national coffers. It will be okay because a higher power (daddy?) will intercede and make it better. Put your money on the champagne-battalion, low-C, cheerleader, Paul. I'll go with the real Bronze Star, Silver Star, and three Purple Heart veteran. DARTOID: Correct o'mundo you are, Eduardo. Kerry wore some medals. You can wear 'em to. All you have to do is dive into the Reflecting Pool and fish them out from where he tossed 'em. Not that a chest-full of medals is gonna make a difference at the line... I have to admit though (all political posturing aside) you have given me some pause for thought. That is -- you, former Bush-insiders Paul O'Neill and Richard Clarke (bet you never thought you'd see your name in the same sentence as these guys), the unrelenting network news and my wife (like you, she's a wild and crazy liberal who used to march on nuclear power plants). Right now, I'm not sure how anybody could vote for either of these guys. As convinced as I was (and remain) when we first started this exchange that Bush would whoop Kerry in a hypothetical darts match, it's startin' to feel like "deja vu all over again" on the electoral front. Honestly. It's downright freaky. Kids comin' home in caskets. Citizens marchin' in the streets. Congressional investigations. Insiders -- people who should know -- linin' up, one after the other, calling Bush another Tricky Dick... Just like you, I was inside the beltway when Watergate broke. As a student intern for a Republican on the Hill, I sure as hell wasn't flippin' the bird at Nixon motorcades, at least not until the whole thing unraveled. Then I was flippin the bird in the mirror for believin' in the man. And it didn't unravel, as events seem to be this time around, until well after the 1972 election was over and done. What so many loyalists simply couldn't believe was true in the summer of '72 turned out to be far worse than anybody's imagination. I don't know where this is all headin' now, but something's terribly wrong. Even the most hard-core Republicans have to be nervous. As to the World Darts Championship I'm still puttin' my money on the President. Assumin' he's not sharin' a cell with Martha Stewart by the time Ladbrokes rolls around, I'm convinced he's got the arrows to send Kerry packin'. This is gonna be a serious steel-tip battle. Bounce-outs that count in the electronic game ain't gonna mean diddly -- so even if Bush does turn out to be a prevaricator there will be no advantage or disadvantage in it at the line. Bush doesn't need to "know what a double-out" is -- he'll throw at whatever makes sense to him and he'll nail it. Need a missile to wipe out the other kid's little league coach? Want to invade Toronto? Bush played baseball, for Christsake. You aren't gonna see him skiing down some slope in girly-boy designer duds. He owned a frickin' baseball team! He knows (well, at least he used to know) how to suck down a couple of six-packs. Moreover, Bush not only acts like a darter he talks like one. "I want the folks to see me," Bush once said, "sitting in the same kind of seat they're sitting in, eating the same popcorn, peeing in the same urinal." Like Jimmy Carter (and even Kerry, I suppose, who once dated Morgan Fairchild and Catherine Oxenberg) he probably even "lusts in his heart." Right or wrong on the issues, Bush is a committed, get-things-done, regular kinda guy. He's a darts kinda quy. Straight sets I say, old boy. Straight sets. ED: So, Paul, is that another gay bashing thing? Sorry, I couldn't resist. Since you were in Washington at the time, you might remember that the Vietnam Vets Against the War was a huge boost. I was at the first welcoming demonstration and later when they brought in the cast of Hair for a concert. Being reminded of it now, I vaguely remember hearing Kerry speak. Awesome times. The movement had spread from college kids who were deferred, to blue collar kids who didn't want to go, to the parents of the college kids who were getting arrested, to the parents of kids who were coming home in bags, and finally the Vets, themselves. "Tin soldiers and Nixon coming, we're finally on our own...". Jr.'s sure got the flash (I'll grant you that) and someone in his corner knows how to work the spectators (I'll give you that too), but I think it's going to take more. The latest thing I heard was that your boy wants to limit the number of times these guys will actually go mano a mano. Sounds like a lack of stamina to me. Or guts. Or an inability to plan ahead, which seems to be one of his weaker points. Theme music, smoke effects and wardrobe-supplied flight suits generate pre-match excitement, but don't forget the quiet guys from the past -- like Jerry Umberger and Jocky Wilson -- who've shown they can talk soft but carry a big dart. They wouldn't let someone bluff and connive his way into a win. And neither will Kerry. GWB can't put a 3-dart combination together any better than he can put 3 syllables together. I predict when the going gets tough Bush will get so tangled in the puppet strings that he'll put all three in his foot. So Paul, I think you and I have marked our positions fairly well on how the upcoming match will play out but. Before we close, however, I have another perspective to examine that might add to the commentary. I'll just bet Bush's last doubles partner, Tony Blair, is having second thoughts on the brilliance of that pairing. I wonder if, late at night, he doesn't hear, in Spanish of course, "They took us for a ride." DARTOID: I agree, Ed. Just like a dog pees on a tree, you've marked Kerry's position quite admirably. Sorry, but to quote you: I couldn't resist! I also think you have an excellent point. Kerry says foreign leaders support him. If you and I are to serve our objective here (what was that again?) we simply must solicit another perspective -- the steady, unbiased, view of someone who is not an American citizen, truly understands darts, knows what it takes to compete and win on the world darts stage AND who (preferably) has a close, personal relationship with Tony Blair. Who might this be, you ask? Why, but of course: three-time world champion and darts legend, John Lowe! I tracked him down on his mobile. As British persons are known to do, he was walkin' the moors somewhere, sippin' Earl Grey and muchin' on a cucumber sandwich... We're down to the wire, John. We're on the stage. Ladbrokes, baby. You've heard of that, right? Bush versus Kerry. So what say you, 'O British One? Can you help us wrap this sucker up? Please try to use "proper" English. JOHN: Let's get one thing straight from the off: the only walking Lowey does is up and down the Oche, and maybe the odd few miles on the tread machine. At least that way you finish where you start. And the only Earl I know is Spensor. Had the privilege of meeting his daughter one day. Yes, that one: Lady Di. That would have been some book to find yourself in, no such luck. Bush v Kerry. In British terms that's like David Blunket v Mark Thatcher. The first knows were he's going but cannot see it; the second can see were he's going but doesn't know how to get there. Blunket is blind but speaks a great vision (if the truth is known his dog is a ventriloquist). Thatcher, the son of the Great One, is a rally driver of note. The problem is he just cannot read a map: he was once lost in the Sahara desert for five days. Both, just like Bush and Kerry, qualify for the championship. They have that one vital ingredient to play the game of numbers: they are full of BULL. Politics is just like darts and sex. You need a good start. In George's case he has September 11, a good performance in the middle (Afghanistan and Iraqi) and a quick get out (that's plan "B" should he lose). Kerry, well he just needs a start. Any start will do. THE BIG MATCH Venue: Circus Tavern. Purfleet. London. Date: Election Day -- November 2, 2004. Format: One leg of 501 Chalkers: Loyal supporters -- Prime Minister Tony Blair & Spanish President Jose Maria Aznar MC/Caller: Osama Bin Laden MC Osama throws the dinar in the air. Bush runs behind the curtain muttering "shit." Kerry stands firm, medals glistening in the stage lights. Bush calls correct and wins the chance to cork first but true to form throws the advantage away, missing by a country. Kerry scores dead centre and takes his stance at the electrified Oche. He knows one centimeter over the line and he will be lit for all to see. Kerry handles the spinning dart board well-worth 140. Bush, the first man to enter office with a criminal record, a worthwhile maximum: 180! Kerry scores heavily again after revealing his persuasion, a liberal elitist 100. Bush has a dart bounce out -- his security have not checked the finer 101. points -- disaster: 25. Kerry purposely toes the electric Oche. His hair turns white, his medals light up, he's on fire: 100. Bush calls on the big guns, misses the empty tent and hits the camel, a.k.a. Al-Quida: 140. Kerry, his fondness of Ketchup, constant name dropping and affection for the ladies, puts him right up there with the champion of power, the Happy Scottish Groper: 100. Bush gets confused, doesn't know the difference between: a "lot" (100) and a "little" (3), begins to show nerves and only scores: 45. Kerry now only needs 61 to win and take his place in the biggest nuclear target in the world. He coolly throws his first dart in the fat 11 leaving the centre bull, the cork, for victory. But what's he doing! Kerry puts his darts on the table and calmly takes a drink of the holy water. He's addressing the markers, telling them how good it is to see them here, how they will be welcome to his new White House home. Blair is nodding and saying "thank you, thank you, thank you." Aznar is shaking his head: "I'm on the heap after this; your mate over there has seen to that." Osama steps in and reminds the challenger he only has 30 seconds to return to the Oche. Kerry takes his stance, but his back is to the board. He pulls out a mirror, straightens his hair and calmly throws the dart over his shoulder. Thud! The dart hits the centre bull. Osama calls "Game, set and match" and holds Kerry's arm aloft, at the same time whispering in his ear: "Now he's gone maybe we can be friends; we could meet with Tony at Gadaffi's place." He then turns to George who is standing on the electronic Oche (that way he does not have to force a smile, unlucky): "You lost the plot, I mean the match." The smoke machine comes on and the stage is engulfed. After a few minutes the smoke clears to reveal a lonely figure. It is Tony Blair, standing alone, looking out to the now empty arena. His words continue to echo 'round the great Tavern, "thank you, thank you, thank you..." The Bush v Kerry match is over, or is it? The press has just announced a re-match. Bush accuses Kerry of breaking the advertising standards rules -- he had "Heinz Ketchup" written on the barrels. The re-match will take place in Florida. Kerry agrees on condition: the new markers will be French President Jacques Chirac and Russian President Vladimir Putin. The MC will be Kofi Anon. There gentlemen: I rest the case for Bush v Kerry. Let the BULL continue. DARTOID: Kerry wins? Impossible! ED: Hey, it's your column, mate. It wasn't me who called in an independent observer. You made the bed, buddy. Toss and turn in it. DARTOID: Obviously John Lowe knows about as much about darts as you know about politics!!! ED: Well, how about that, Paul. Finally, we agree on something! From the Field, Dartoid for Tournament Darts International Ed: Paul, shouldn't that be, "From the Weeds? :) Dartoid is the nom de plume of Florida resident, Paul Seigel. His columns are syndicated in dart publications around the world and appear on numerous websites. He has, in fact, traveled around the world many times over - always in search of the perfect game, in the perfect pub, while quaffing the perfect libation. Ed Edwards is the current director of the TDI Dart League, Wash., DC. Ed has been an avid supporter and promoter of the sport for 30+ years. In 1996 he organized a goodwill competition between a team from the Amundsen-Scott Research Station at the South Pole and a team from the nation's capital. It's been billed as the "Worlds First Trans-Global Internet Audio Dart Match". There is insufficient room to relate John Lowe's accomplishments. First player to score a perfect 9 dart 501 on TV. Three time World Champion. A record 15 World Open titles. Over 1000 titles won in all. And... he's a very funny guy.A Perspective of and Prospectus for the TDI Dart League
(a memo to present and potential league members) TDI was originally formed in 1975 as a travel league to promote players wishing to compete at the national and international level. Early on it became apparent that an innovative local platform would best serve those needs. In 1976 the local TDI league took form and has since blazed trails that others have followed. First in our region to introduce singles play, first in our region to introduce the 2-board format, and a front runner with 6 person teams (down from 8). Because of its heritage, TDI has consistently tried to foster talent, and recognize and reward achievement. All of our members are covered by our ADO* affiliation. TDI has promoted iter-league competitions and established bonds with other leagues across the country. We have prevailed upon top ranked players to put on exhibitions and provide clinics. There exists no better gauge of 301 proficiency than the TDI rating system. We have been a contributor to the annual It's A Women's Thing Tournament** since its beginning and have consistently covered the entry fees for any of our ladies wishing to attend. TDI sponsor-bars paid #1 ranked Nancy Huntoon's airfare to England in 1999 so she might compete for the US Team. TDI has been a major contributor to the National Darts Hall of Fame and was the first league inducted into the Hall. We also organized an Internet audio match against a team from the South Pole in 1996 - a true milestone. TDI is the proud administrator of the Jerry Umberger Legion of Goodwill Award***. Here we are, this dink little league within the confines of the Nation's Capitol that has earned its international name by garnering international recognition. Were you not previously aware of these accomplishments, I suspect your newly acquired knowledge will not affect your dart performance one whit. I bring them to your attention, however, to emphasize a couple of critical points. TDI is a "dart" league. That's what we're about. There are social organizations in other cities called "pub" leagues. They offer organized dart play, but their main goal is to supply "fun". If the majority of the participants decide they want to shoot blow darts from 40 feet, no problem. TDI would prefer to appeal to folks who derive their fun playing "steel-tip darts". Within this context is another subtle though noteworthy distinction, that of respect for the sport. We stress good sportsmanship and delight in camaraderie, all within the framework of friendly competition. The only way possible to show regard for the sport is by extending polite respect for the opponent. The history, the traditions and the principals of the TDI league have served us well. The more our members become involved, the more satisfaction each of us may draw from our association. There are vistas further than the eye can see within and beyond the league. We are always anxious to utilize the talents of all of our members for the furtherance of the sport. If you wish to simply come out once a week for your match, have fun, and not be concerned until the following week, that is ok. If you have a desire to see just how good you can get, we're here for you. If you'd like to volunteer some time to enhance the league and the sport, step right up. You can take out of the league experience all that you are willing to put into it. * American Darts Organization ** The only weekend-long women's-only tourney in the US *** Bestowed on major individuals whose conduct on and off the board enhance the sport by their mere participation in the sport. Sincerely, Ed Edwards for Tournament Darts InternationalMeet the Bullseye
So, you want to be a dart player? Ok, you don't want to be a dart player but it's something to do, or your friends are into it, or your foosball gloves are being re-seamed. Whatever. I'm going to give you the crash course so you can, at least, act like you know what your doing. First, and maybe most important, you have to "talk the talk". You can always make up some excuse for not hitting what you're throwing at. (My favorite is that I was really throwing at what I hit.) But we're talking jargon, now. Those numbers around the outside; they pertain to the pie shaped wedges they are adjacent to. The wedges are broken into four segments. The thin colored band at the outside is worth 2X the indicated value and is called, conveniently, the double ring or a "double". The similar band, about midway to the center is the triple ring. Anything that lands in the light or dark field areas between the triple and the center counts as 1X or face value. The outside very center ring is worth 25 points and the inside is 50. That is "bull" or "cork" and "double bull" or "double cork" respectively. Working from the outer edge of the board is "no score" (the place where the numbers are), "double", "single", "triple", "single", 25, and 50. Got it? Great! Now is probably a good time to point out that the "trip" 20 is worth more than the double bull, as are trips of 19, 18 and 17. It's also worth noting that the larger numbers are next to smaller numbers. That is done so that if you miss, you pay a price. Personally, I've countered that safeguard, often missing by 2 numbers, therefore foiling the system. A rule of thumb for finding the big numbers is, the white ones at the top, the black ones at the bottom. A good place for a novice to work the board is the "back alley". That is the triple area of the numbers 11 and 14. Misses will get you a score in the mid 30s and the occasional trip will bump you higher yet. There are three necessary comments to master..."Good darts", "Hard darts", and "Tough darts". The first is congratulatory; the latter two are condolence. There is a reason there are twice the number of stock phrases for misses than hits. There are other "observations" that will be cited later in this article. For now, let's stick with what will get you by. To round out the lingo lesson, the only remaining critical terminological aspect is the dart itself. Point, barrel, shaft, and flight. The shaft holds the flight and it screws into the barrel of the dart. The flight is the feather type thing at the back and is generally made of light plastic. Remember, "pointy-end first". You are ready to play. Should you wish to actually hit something, you might, then, continue reading and learn to "walk the walk". Before you walk too far, let's discuss where and how to stand. If there is a line or tape on the floor, you should not throw from in front of that line. Doing so is a "foot fault" and people will yell at you. The line is officially called the oche (rhymes with hockey), but no one every says that, probably because they are afraid they'll mispronounce it. Stand with your right toe at the line if you are right handed. Left foot should be slightly behind, by enough to maintain your balance when you throw. Some folks lean forward. You want more weight on the leading foot but your center of gravity should not be more forward than a plumb line from your right foot to your right shoulder. Sound confusing? In the simplest of terms: stand so that the act of throwing does not force your body to move from a stationary platform or, in extreme cases, cause you to fall over. Standing at the line, point with your whole arm and finger toward the center of the board. That position is where your shoulder and upper arm should be throughout your throw. The "throw" is actually accomplished by the pivotal motion of the forearm from the elbow, and a little wrist action if it feels more comfortable to do so. The dart is brought back to the eye or the side of the head and released just shy of the forearm being perpendicular to the floor. "Aiming" is not seeing the dart lined up to the target on the board, but rather subtly aligning the release point with the target and controlling where it hits by the amount of thrust behind it. Try not to stick the flight end in your eye. This has conclusively been proven to have an adverse effect on your proficiency at, and enjoyment of, the game. It's now time to get a "grip". How you hold the dart is called your grip. Start by grasping the barrel like a right-handed person would a pencil, slightly forward of center. Play with what works for you. The goal is for the dart to fly (not wobble) through the air, with a slight arc. If it hits the board sideways, you're doing it wrong. From above, the path from where you begin your stroke to where it enters the board should be a straight motion forward. This is a good place to pick up more ammo for your excuse arsenal. Applied to loaned or "bar" darts, "the balance of this dart is just not right for me" works really well. Balance is much more critical than weight in determining what does work for you. Ok, if you've gotten this far with my little tutorial, and you've never actually thrown a real dart at a real dartboard, I want to guarantee you one thing. Following every step that I have described here, your first dart will miss the board completely. It should end up about 2 feet low. This is because the motion does not feel fluid or natural. You are concerned about throwing a pointed object with force. That is a good thing to keep in mind, especially in a crowded bar. Try to think of the motion involved in crumpling up a piece of paper and tossing it into a trash can. Same thing. The new player should keep a couple of things in mind. It doesn't take much to become adequate. The key is consistency. Initially what you would like to achieve is a good "grouping". Once you can throw 3 darts and get them into a circumference of, say, a baseball, then you can work on moving that group to target spots and numbers on the board. The throwing motion specific to darts needs for a "muscle memory" to be developed. If you have some time to just throw on your own you will discover what is most productive for you. Don't worry about it, however, when you're out in a group to have fun. Just enjoy. Earlier I promised that I would supply a few gratuitous "observations" to be used with your friends. "Nice group" can apply to 3 tight 20s. With a slight change of inflection it can also be said of 3 tight 1s. "That's the biggest board we could find." is another timely comment when directed toward your opponent -or your partner. My all-time favorite, although I hear it more often than I get an opportunity to use it is, "...couldn't hit a bull in the ass with a banjo". - Ed EdwardsBallad of the Stalwart Six
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- in the fashion of "Casey At The Bat" The Stalwart Six had spent all week gearing up for Wednesday's game. On Sunday they talked of fortune, on Monday it was fame. When Tuesday finally rolled around not one had touched a dart, But they were all convinced that every man could do his part. ~ An hour early for the match they lined up at the bar. Each player bought a round of drinks, and vowed he'd be a star. By 8pm the visitors were gathered at the boards The hour was at hand for the opponents to cross swords. ~ It was decided Mike would start. He'd just come from the john. When Mike couldn't find his darts, the lead-off fell to Ron. Knocking back a shot of malt, Ron rose to take the line. He looked a little woozy but all knew he'd do just fine. ~ Off the wire, off the wire, each arrow just missed its goal, Possibly the last libation had had a costly toll. The first leg did not go well, the contest not so near. If Ron were to gain control, he'd have to switch to beer. ~ Alas, the fates were scowling, as the second leg went down. Ron marched straight from board to bar, his face cast in a frown. Michael would be the next to shoot but with a borrowed set. He remembered where his darts were. He'd lost them in a bet. ~ Mike did his very best but, he claimed, the music was too loud. His focus was impaired. He couldn't hear above the crowd. Betweem turns he'd mumble to his beer, then take another sip, But in a while he'd gone down, and the team sat at 2/zip. ~ "Team meeting, team meeting", they huddled around the taps. Captain Bill's stentorian words were inspiring to his chaps. They had to "...pull their act together. And get back on the mark. What was going through their minds? This wasn't just a lark." ~ Renewed in determination they toasted with Johnny Black. No "neophytes" could win on "their" turf. They "owned" the inside track. Back to the match they swaggered to watch Bill take the toe. Willie was their guiding light and could be a one-man show. ~ It wasn't very pretty but Will eked out the set's first game. Having grabbed leg one, however, the next two came up lame. Just two more defeats and the match forever would be lost. Not their "finest hour", more a clinic of bad darts tossed. ~ It would be so grand to relate - a tale of end-game cheer, But the earlier bravado soon became tears shed into beer. Bob, the "new guy", barely managed to win his set in three. That was the last glint of hope though, the night was not to be. ~ A following pair of easy wins sealed the Stalwart's fate. In their own bar, in front of pals, the Six were shown the gate. Gracious, albeit begrudged, they shook the winners hands. "Tough try" and "Next season", was said, "That's how the cookie lands." ~ The victors exited slowly, the vanquished followed pace. "What had gone wrong? Why did they fail? How did this rout take place?" Will wanted to re-hash the loss, to see what they should do but all the lads had left 'cept Mike, who was puking in the loo. - Ed EdwardsMore Than Meets the (Bulls) Eye
(from the "On Tap" newspaper) For over 30 years there has been organized league dart play in DC and the surrounding suburban counties. The city can boast being one of country's earliest providers of structured competition and a significant proselytizer for the sport over the entire mid-atlantic region. Sometimes referred to as the invisible sport, most observers do not realize there are national and international dart competitions that, elsewhere on the globe, attract wide media coverage and generate great public interest. For example, the bi-annual World Cup Invitational matches draw teams from 55 eligible countries. On a local level, there are presently at least five moderate sized yearly events within an hour or two's drive from the city. Moderate in this case means that the total purses awarded by each will be in the $3,000 to $10,000 range. Not bad for a bar game, right? That, however, pales in comparison to the yearly $50,000 North American Open Dart Tournament held in Las Vegas, which in turn is overshadowed by the Nally Golden Harvest Tournament. Golden Harvest, a Canadian annual event, is worth $300,000. Needless to say, these competitions, and others here and abroad, draw from around the world. For those of us with more modest talents (or ambitions), the city offers three dart leagues that cater mostly, but not exclusively, to those simply interested in a weekly match at a local pub. And should your team manage to best the competitors in your division (divisions being determined by talent level), you could walk away with a trophy for your efforts. An enjoyable and social evening out, with an emphasis on good sportsmanship and camaraderie, are what is being proffered. That is not to say that the serious player, with above average ability, need look elsewhere. To the contrary, all of the leagues commend excellence and are eager to see their players advance up the ranks. "Attitudes", on the other hand, are discouraged. "Darts is a sport that begins and ends with a handshake". This is a quote often cited by a former TDI director, Mike Smolka whose been playing since 1985. Currently Mike competes in all 3 regional leagues. "I get great satisfaction from being part of a team. My work schedule is such that I am out of town quite a bit, but as a part-time player on 3 teams, I'm assured of at least one league match a week. It's a concession for teams," he says with a grin, "so I try to make my contribution worthwhile." A sterling example of excellence in our region is Nancy Huntoon who plays for a TDI league team, Beauty and the Beasts, out of Ireland's 4 Provinces in Cleveland Park. She's the beauty in case you're wondering. Nancy has been ranked number one woman player in the US by the American Darts Organization and has competed for our country in a number of world events. She will be delighted to shake your hand - and then show you how the game should be played. Nancy has an educational background in Motion in Sports, which may give her an added advantage.
FYI- the 1999 National Sporting Goods Association's survey of sports participation ranks dart-throwing the No. 16 most-popular sports activity in the nation, putting it ahead of baseball, No. 18; soccer, No. 20; and tennis, No. 27. The ranking was also reported in a recent edition of Street & Smith's Sports Business Journal.
Participants are drawn to the game/sport for various reasons, but the initial allure is usually the aspect of friendly competition. Certainly, in league, one is always vying for the win, but it is not uncommon to see players from opposing teams sharing a table when they're not "at the line". It is also an endeavor that allows women to hold their own against the men, and the 90-pound weakling to stand against the jock. Trey Addington, a long-time advocate, is eager to assure potential recruits that, "there is a place in the sport for every level of talent". He freely encourages them to become involved in the process and is ever vigilant for those with skills that can be employed away from the boards in administration and promotion. Trey is a former WADA board member and current VADL team captain. The sport is as uncomplicated (and complex) as crumpling a piece of paper and tossing it in a trash can. By virtue of that simplicity, it has the potential to become very addictive. Indeed, a lot of dilettantes start out as fairly good and experience a drop once they start thinking about what they're doing. Soon they pick back up, but the occurrence is quite common. Dart throwing can be very much a Zen thing. Simplicity itself. Most players are more than willing to explain the particulars to any interested bystander. The games played and the local league structures are easily defined. The following is what one can expect in the District of Columbia, but the reader is to understand that much of what is described pertains as well to the Maryland and Virginia suburbs. In DC, league matches take place on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights at a dozen or so sponsor pubs. Teams are four or six (minimum) players. Half of the season's matches are played "away" and half at "home". Season's are regularly between 10 and 12 weeks in length and there are 3 seasons per year. The games played are `01 (the world standard) and Cricket (an American innovation) and involve singles, doubles and team contests. Women compete on an equal footing with the men. Play generally starts between 7:30 and 8 PM and ends (once again, generally) about 11:30. There is a nominal fee for joining a league.
FYI- Almost 21 million Americans participated at least casually in the sport of darts in 1998 according to a National Sporting Goods Association survey.
As mentioned, there are other special events held in our region and we are fortunate to be home to the yearly "Just Us Girls" competition. This is the only weekend long women's-only tournament in the country. The 2000 contest is set for Oct. 28-29 and will be held in Silver Spring, Md. The 1999 affair drew close to 100 participants from 6 states. This is a marvelous venue for ladies who want to dip a toe in the larger competitive waters. The atmosphere is congenial and they hold a dinner for all entrants. Also in October, the WADA league will host a $3000 tournament in Sterling, Va. The dates are the 3rd, 4th, and 5th. WADA is trying to offer 3 events a year with their major one set in the Spring. It carries an ADO sanction, offers points that are applied to a national ranking, and carries a larger purse. In addition to league and tournament play, several establishments in the immediate vicinity hold weekly "Lucks". A luck-of-the-draw contest partners 2 players at random to vie against other pairs for a piece of the pot (usually the entry fees plus an additional sum contributed by the bar). The format is most often best of 3 legs of Cricket and `01. Persons wishing to locate bars that sponsor teams or teams that may be looking for additional players should contact the official sources below. Pubs requiring advice on setting up boards or registering or generating teams should do likewise.
FYI- According to Consumer Product Safety Commission data for the period of 1997 through July 31, 2000, only 30 injuries related to darts were reported to participating hospitals. Two thirds of these injuries occurred at home. None required an over-night stay. The ADO has conducted a survey of pub owners that have darts on their premises. ADO found no dart-related insurance claims that had ever been filed as a result of an on-site injury, nor have any been reported to the ADO as a direct result of competition at the tournament level.
In the District, the single most authoritative font of week-to-week information about each of the leagues is Ginny Swingle, bartender at Mickey's Patio on Capitol Hill. When she applied for a position eight years ago at the now defunct Mr. Eagan's, one of the first questions asked was, "So, do you like darts?" Having started playing here soon after she graduated from the University of Tennessee, she answered positively. Ginny recalls walking down Connecticut Avenue after the interview and thinking, "What a silly question." Her first night of work was a league night. Trial under fire. Today, there isn't much she doesn't know about what's going on and can point you in the right direction for everything else. If you're a first-time patron at Mickey's, before you're asked what you'd like to drink, you'll hear, "So, do like darts?" Even if the answer is negative, she'll still try to place you on a team. - Ed Edwards --- A list of all of the region's sponsor pubs followed plus contact information for the 3 area leagues and Just Us Girls.- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - The Art of Invisibility and the Value of No
(from the CyberDarts website) The Invisible Art I don't suppose there exists an adult American who cannot, at a glance, recognize a dartboard. Ask a child to draw a picture of a dart and the response will be immediate and the result, easily recognizable. Any Hollywood movie set depicting a bar interior would require deliberate thought to not having a dartboard hanging in some corner. Sporting equipment retailers tell me a high percentage of their board sales are to people "decorating" their rec. rooms. To these buyers a dartboard is wall art. So how is it, with all that, no one knows we exist? As enlightened to the tools of our trade as the public might be, they are unaware of the art and the artisans. Local, national and international organized competition is beyond their ken. Our heroes roam unrecognized outside of their element. There are a couple of dart oriented web sites that have a page devoted to direct and indirect darts instances from books, movies and TV. It's as though we were a band of UFO cultists who broadcast to one another our most recent sightings. I, personally, became aware of the New Zealand mystery writer, Ngaio Marsh, because her book, Death at the Bar, had a dartboard on the cover. Our numbers are not small, nor do we compete in secret, yet we are relegated to obscurity, anonymity, and, perish the thought, insignificance. The British have a sport called Cricket that has nothing to do with darts. Although most of us are aware of the game, very few outside the UK understand and can relate the rules and object. Most Americans are that way with darts as well. "Closest to bullseye, right?"... "Not bloody quite." What's going on? How did we acquire this translucent mantle? Not only do I not know, I don't think I really care. I don't believe knowing is going to contribute much toward a solution. Something had to occupy the edge of the periphery and, at least for now, that something is us. No Becoming Know What can be done and who is to do it? The answer quite conveniently lies with you. Not the collective, all encompassing, other guy you, but the singular, off your butt, on your feet you. You know your capabilities, resources and talents. I'm sure your imagination is equal to mine. The task is straightforward: to highlight the sport you enjoy, the league in which you participate, the players you admire- anything that might remove the veil from at least a few people's eyes. Prior to 1975, the point at which the Washington Area Darts Association went to permanent membership, the sitting president of the United States was sent WADA card #1 each year. Presumably those presidents never actually received the cards. They were intercepted by staff, logged as honoraria and, at best, ended up in a crate destined for the basement. Possibly one or two persons involved in the process appreciated the gesture. That possibility alone made the effort well spent. Two years ago I sent out 22 letters to my area's radio stations asking them to broadcast, as a public service, the It's A Women's Thing tournament. Prompted by some follow up effort, one of the stations subsequently interviewed two of the organizers. One might think one of 22 is good. I certainly did. But what if there had been no response? Failure? Not at all. What would have happened, and, in fact, did happen was that 22 people in a position to do some good for our sport were made aware of its existence. That 21 of 22 chose inaction at that specific time is immaterial. There needs be an additional factor taken into account when promotion is designed and implemented. The focus, at present, is generally confined to increasing player numbers and expanded activity. What should be included in the mix is increased public awareness. A league may (and should) have in its repertoire tools to attract players and sponsors. What is also required are the means to enlighten those with no knowledge of our structure, function, goals and numbers. Whenever you make an effort to engage another person's interest in our sport, even if they do not deliver what you hoped for, you have the opportunity to leave that individual with a greater knowledge of the sport and a favorable impression of its emissaries. We need to join this siege for the long haul and take delight when the skirmishes go our way. Certainly our best strategy is to enlist as many allies as possible and, in doing so, we will find future battles more easily won. - Ed Edwards- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - TDI's own STARR REPORT
Theodore Starr, philanthropist and humanitarian did not have time for the game, but thought it could be wholesome family entertainment. Kimberly Starr, International super model, although blonde, can spell darts, I think... I mean I didn't ask... like, who cares? Ringo Starr, train conductor and former Beatles drummer, is British- `nuff said. Brenda Starr, cartoon newspaper reporter, wrote a scathing expose on the game of darts but it was spiked. Bart Starr, football player, has been caught on film darting down the field. Belle Starr, legendary cowgirl, pronounced the sport safer than riding into town randomly firing a gun into the air...
- but not quite as much fun.
***
